What is it about swimming in a river? Especially when it’s called the Firehole. There’s a thrill of the current — it could sweep you down river to those falls we just drove past — yet it’s not the tide; it couldn’t sweep you out to the endless horizon. There’ll be a beaver dam to catch you. You can swim against it and swim in place. You can swim with it and swim faster than you ever have before. That rush. It’s thrilling. It takes my breath away.

You put your feet down, you stand. And the water keeps flowing. Drop something in it, something buoyant, and its’s swept away. I want to drop my worries in, my shame. I want to submerge my whole body and let that current discover every little spot on my body that needs cleansing and sweep away all the dirt, clean the scars, smooth over the rough patches. I want to go down in the deep part, feel the pull against me, resist it. Let that pull heal me, let it carry it all away.